The Burning House - An Epic 3 Night Event

I once came across a building that stood alone in a field and saw that it was on fire. Initially I looked around the structure to see if I could notice anyone that may need to be rescued and then I heard some faint yelling and screams. That was my sign, there were people inside so I found an entry way I saw safe enough to storm through. Once inside, I managed my way through the smoke and burnt debris in search of anyone that could use my help. I followed the screams and yelling until I found a small bunch of people who needed to be rescued. They looked like they were in decent shape so I said follow me, I know a way out. So they followed me until I found an elevator. I decided to use the elevator because it would lead us out easier. We got in the elevator and rode it down a level and then it lead us right out into the field where we were safe.

I found myself in a field staring down a building that was on fire. I looked at it and analyzed the situation, figuring out if there was anyone inside that might need to be rescued. Once I found an entry way, I went inside because I was sure there were people in here that needed to be rescued. I looked and looked until I found some people in a room. I told them I was there to rescue them and they were happy. So they followed me until we came across an elevator. I thought to myself that the elevator would be a faster way down to the first floor to get out. So we went down the elevator and stepped out to find that the elevator lead us right out of the burning building into safety but it was so odd. I thought to myself, didn’t I already do this?

There I was standing in a field staring down a building that was on fire. Alright, this is it! I’m staring down this building for the 3rd time on fire. This time I knew there was people inside so I went right to where they were and were able to get them out. For the 3rd time, I realized I’m repeating myself here. This is so odd, why am I doing this once again. I got in, got the people and lead them until we came across that same elevator again. This time I refused to go down the elevator. I chose that first of all, during a fire, you shouldn’t ride the elevator because that’s dangerous. We took the stairs. We went down the stairs and we ended up in a very long hallway with the exit way down the way with the building on fire around us. The elevator took the easy way out the first 2 times and now because I wanted to do something different, we end up here? We almost didn’t make out this time but barely, we did….the end!

I believe it was very interesting that I had this dream 3 times in a row with the outcome changing on the 3rd time. I didn’t think anything of it at first but it does make you wonder, was it my mind telling me something. Let’s take it one step further, maybe God was trying to tell me something. Maybe I’m just over analyzing it. Maybe its absolutely nothing at all. Whatever the case may be, I leave it up to you to take whatever it is you want to take from it…thank you.

The Origin Of "God Bless You"

Everything we know today had to start from somewhere right? There just had to be a reason at some point in time to why we do what we do now. When you think of traditions like Halloween, Christmas and Easter, they all had some kind of origin. Even if you simplify it to simple family traditions, someone had to start the tradition to be a tradition and then it has to carry over from old to young. One of the things I recently discovered was that there is a recorded believed tradition to a very common phrase which is “God Bless You.” When you think about this phrase, your immediate reaction has to be that the intentions had to have been good because it’s a positive phrase and on top of that, it is just polite to say it after someone sneezes.

As a young man, my mother taught us the importance of the phrase as she was taught. First of all, the common theme is its polite but the more important part of it was the implications of if you don’t say the phrase. What kind of implications could such a thing have? Well, it was taught to me also that when you sneeze, your heart skips a beat or it stops for a few seconds. Is that medically proven? Regardless if it is or not, here’s the story evolving as it’s being told to me. When you sneeze, your heart stops for a brief moment and it’s during that moment, Satan, the Devil or some ungodly spirit sneaks into your heart and that’s when he gets in and starts messing with you, causing you to sin and do bad things. The reason for saying “God Bless You” was a way to prevent the Devil from entering your heart. What a crazy thing to tell a child but that’s what my mother told me! As I got older, I found that to be a silly superstition but kept on saying “God Bless You” only because it’s the polite thing to do and everyone does it. I wonder does it truly make it right if the initial implication was good. I’ll let you decide.

I did a little research and found this interesting piece of history on the origin of the phrase “God Bless You.” This taken from a Wikipedia piece explains the history. You have to take it for what it is based on the source but the theme is common on most different sites:

Several possible origins are commonly given. The practice of blessing someone who sneezes, dating as far back as at least AD 77, however, is far older than most specific explanations can account for.

One explanation holds that the custom originally began as an actual blessing. Gregory I became Pope in AD 590 as an outbreak of the bubonic plague was reaching Rome. In hopes of fighting off the disease, he ordered unending prayer and parades of chanters through the streets. At the time, sneezing was thought to be an early symptom of the plague. The blessing ("God bless you!") became a common effort to halt the disease.

A variant of the Pope Gregory I story places it with Pope Gregory VII, then tells the common story of “Ring around the Rosey” being connected to the same plague. A legend holds that it was believed that the heart stops beating and the phrase "bless you" is meant to ensure the return of life or to encourage your heart to continue beating.

Another version says that people used to believe that your soul can be thrown from your body when you sneeze, that sneezing otherwise opened your body to invasion by the Devil or evil spirits or that sneezing was your body's effort to force out an invading evil spirit. Thus, "bless you" or "God bless you" is used as a sort of shield against evil. The Irish Folk story "Master and Man" by T. Crofton Croker, collected by William Butler Yeats, describes this variation.

Alternatively, it may be possible that the phrase began simply as a response for an event that was not well understood at the time.

Another belief is that people used to see sneezing as a sign that God would answer your prayers or an omen of good fortune or good luck. In this case, "Bless you" would be in recognition of that luck.

Tibetan Buddhists believe a sneeze (like meditation, falling asleep, preparing to die) can provide a moment of "clear consciousness," when people are opened to greater understanding.

It’s pretty obvious that a part of this was in line with what my mom told me as far as the heart stopping and the devil sneaking in when you sneeze. I can’t help but chuckle that the origin was Catholic in nature. It sort of makes sense that this tradition originated from an order from a Pope to combat a deadly disease from infiltrating Rome. Sneezing was one of the first symptoms of this plague so they felt giving the person an actual blessing helped. I am not sure if it did or not but they felt it was a tool they had at their disposal. I can only assume that over time, using the phrase transformed but the overall themed remained the same.

When you think about it, a few questions arise. Isn’t this then a superstition? Our heart doesn’t have to stop beating for the devil to tempt us, mess with us or just attempt to lead us down a bad path of destruction. Saying “God Bless You” really doesn’t have any biblical support and there is no verse to support the need to say “God Bless You” after someone sneezes. I have my own beliefs on the matter but I leave it up to you. All I did was present to you what I discovered. It doesn’t seem at all biblical so you take it for what it’s worth. I leave the rest up to you and God.

The Epic Story of My Demise

The story begins on a near perfect day. The sun is high and bright. The landscape looks like it has been treated beautifully by experts. The sky is as a perfect blue as you can imagine. The scenery doesn’t get any better but it hides an impending doom. One I tend to have to live over and over again. I look to my right and I see a long running wide river. On the other side, I see something similar to a city landscape but not one that is familiar to my eyes. I see off in the near distance, an airport and an airplane taking off. The dreaded feeling of doom sinks in at this moment. I begin to shake but I don’t run as my eyes are now fixed on this airplane. I’ve seen this occur way too many times and at this point, I know what is coming. Usually, the airplane would continue its ascension into the sky as it disappears into the clouds but it is never that simple with me. The plane begins to make a sharp turn and begins to point in my direction. I blink and suddenly I am on the plane. I look around and no one is on board, there never is. I look towards the cockpit and no one is flying the plane so the question always is who is flying the plane. The loading door is open so I head towards it and see the plane is on a direct path into the ground. I wait for the final moments to where the plane is close enough to the ground where I jump from the door. Logic dictates that I should be jumping away from the plane but I manage to jump out and hit the ground as the plan is now on an intercourse with me. I get up and begin to run for it but the plane is getting closer and closer to smacking me in the back. The impact then takes place and I thrust forward as the plane explodes behind me. Having to miraculously survive that initial run, I then begin to notice white dots all over the sky as hundreds of planes now have targeted me. They smash into ground all around me, each one missing me. There are explosions all over the place as this peaceful paradise I once stood in has become a war like zone full of fear and just massive explosions. I so far have been able to stand up against the onslaught and suddenly, as soon as I turn, there’s a 747 in my face and that is the epic story of my demise.

It is over and I awake in my bed safe and sound. Thank God it was only a dream.

Searching for Peace

I think peace is something we all look for but where to look and how do you know what peace will look like when you find it? Its one of those crazy things I’ve been thinking about lately. The title I chose for this entry is the title of a rap song from back in the day. The song is about a trio doing just that, searching for peace while struggling to maintain themselves in the streets to make ends meet. There's a spiritual struggle going on between what the world is almost making you do compared to what you should be doing based on God's word.  This struggle I would say causes a person not to have peace within.  That’s what it was for this particular group and many others out there, I believe.  What is it for you, do you have peace? What is peace anyway? I think peace is not being stressed over anything. I think peace allows you to grow at a slower pace. The grey hairs come in slower, the weight doesn’t add on too quickly and it allows you to enjoy yourself and have fun with life. If you had all that, you would surely share it with people right? What if peace was in manual form? What if you could just read about it? I think that would be the most brilliant way of searching for peace. You could go all over the world in search of it and that it would be that simple but my first mistake was to think I could find it on this world.

That song I was talking about, here’s how the lyrics go in one of the verses. It clearly shows this world’s thirst to peace but unfortunately, most people don’t know where to go so they turn to man, the politician, the miracle healer, the quick fixer upper and themselves. Don’t be lost in this world because it does not give you the answers you need.

Commandments say honor thy Father
Each time I look around, somethin' seems to get that much harder
But just like my man Daniel, I can stand the test of time
But my mind does tend to wander away at times
But all the while, I stay strong, and I keep my faith
Try not to flip out when I got you hungry lions in my face
Steady schemin' on a way to come up off of me
Please, Lord, help me
Deliver me from this agony

Remember that manual I spoke of earlier? I soon discovered there is such a manual that tells about peace and love but also grace and mercy. Remember I mentioned that I was all over the world searching for peace, well guess what, the kind of peace I want is not worldly and can’t be truly promised by any man of this world. The only real peace that we need is in the forever living word of God, the Bible, which is and always will be the ultimate source of peace...Amen!

From One Father to Another

As a father I never claimed to be perfect, that I am prone to make mistakes. Raising a child did not come with a manual so every choice I have to make has to be on the fly. I try to stick to my core values as best as I can but even then they are tested. I always believed my patient would be my strength when it came to raising a child and after being blessed with two, I have come to understand that no matter how ready I thought I was, the actual fact is I never really was ready. Being a father has been the hardest most stressful thing to have to deal with ever in my life. You have so much to try to manage and deal with on a daily basis. Whether they are home or at school, you are always wondering about how their day is going. You're hoping they are establishing healthy relationships with others. You're hoping constantly that you have done enough to prepare them to face the world as they get older. Every day brings new challenges and I try so hard to compare my children's challenges to the ones I had as a child. While there are some similarities, the one thing I have to remember, my parents had to deal with some of those challenges, not me. I went on everyday like there wasn't anything wrong in the world at all. Becoming a parent has given me insight and has finally brought me to an understanding that never existed before. Sure I can contend that I knew my parents didn't have it easy but as I raise my children now, I never knew how much more difficult it was. Its a game and all you want to do is make sure your kids have the resources they need to grow to be productive, to love, to be kind, be thankful in all things and to understand our God is an awesome God. With all this said, no matter what, I am blessed for those two kids God has blessed me with. I have accepted the gifts and will do my best to raise two positive God loving and God fearing children who will love others and respect others.

Understanding a Paranoid Schizophrenic

Getting into the mind of a paranoid schizophrenic is not a safe road to travel on because you will enter a world of twisted unorganized thoughts and a total disconnect from reality. Trying to reason with a paranoid schizophrenic is nearly impossible because you're not just trying to instill logic where there is none, you're also competing with a voice within who will challenge you with even more unorganized thoughts that leaves you feeling dumber more than you can ever imagine yourself feeling meanwhile scratching your head because you don't know what just transpired. You've always thought the person was odd and dismissed it as it is just the way they are but with each passing conversation into a schizophrenic mind leaves walking away again each time more dumbfounded than the last. There comes a point where you come to a conclusion that something is seriously not right. The patterns of behavior also become more twisted and questionable. You wonder why this person is turning the radio up so loud that it sounds like the speakers are about to burst, meanwhile hearing stomping against the floor. You wonder why it sounds like this person is having a full blown conversation with someone and you walk into their room to ask who they are talking too only to find out they were never on the phone. The look in their eyes become the most disturbing because it starts to become obvious, that person you grew up with is no longer there and all they left was a shell of themselves. I never knew looking into someone's eyes can tell so much of that person but it was obvious that it's not that hard to tell because once it's gone, you can almost see the emptiness where that person's soul once was. I know the way I make it sound is dire but it is the absolute truth.

The mental twist that this person went through from year one to year two was absolutely fascinating from an observer standpoint but from a loved one stand point, it was painful to watch and left me shaking my head many times. Having to witness the gentle, sweet person my brother was to this one step from a demon like personality was dreadful. On top of all that, my brother ended up being the paranoid schizophrenic type which is worst because now this person not just went from sane to crazy but also to not trusting anyone. Those he didn't trust were demons to him. He claimed to be Jesus Christ and added the paranoia that people were after him and the government was out to destroy him because only he had the power the knowledge they wanted that would change the world. How his information would change anything is still the mystery today. That's how he thought though and that's how he felt and there was no way to talk him out of it, that's how his mind interpreted reality. The brain is an amazing thing and holds power none of us can ever imagine. One neuron in his brain malfunctions or is not transferring something the way it should can cause all these personality changes. He became overly violent but never hurt anyone but he scared us a lot with his behavior. My parents for almost a year feared for their lives because he lives with them. Can you imagine being woken up at 3 in the morning with him punching the wall or screaming or whatever else. That part is now behind us and hopefully never having to go down that road again. It was hard to understand his psyche but after having experience it first hand, we do have a better understanding, next stop a cure which I am afraid may never happen.

The Torment Within

Back when I was in middle school, I had an assignment to write a short story which I did and I got a good grade for it and while my grammar always had room to improve, I began to wonder about my skills as an author so I began to create a story. At the time, I was way into sci-fi and I had this growing fascination towards girls so with that all said, I started a story. It began as just a few short stories but it progressed and I couldn't stop. It turned into a series so to speak and after give or take 7-8 years, I had compiled quite the amount of stories and ideas. I don't want to give so much away but the short story below is just a quick put together of the idea that I ran with for so many years. This short story is from the point of the view of the main character.

I stand alone as the victor of a war that took too many years to win. When it began, I was young and naïve and such a responsibility was trusted upon me unlike any other. It was presented to me as my destiny and I couldn’t run from it and believe me, I tried but eventually, I had accepted this fact and took it upon myself to fulfill that destiny. I had good friends along the way as well and they helped tremendously. I can’t imagine being in this moment of victory without them. We took many hits along the way and traveled over great distances and into realms one couldn’t imagine and they would be so unreal to you, but so real to us.

There she was, lying on the ground, grasping for air and before one would think that I beat up some girl, take the moment to let this sink in. She is not of this world; she is not what she appears to be to the naked eye. This being, this thing is pure concentrated evil on an imaginable scale. Simply, she is not human. When granted the opportunity, would destroy our beautiful planet over and over again. She is not to be taken lightly. There I was, the victor, looking down upon her and with the little last bit of energy she has, she turns to me.

“You may defeat me but remember this, evil cannot be defeated, another will come for you.”

Words like that can be very haunting but that’s where we stood. My friends who witnessed this fight come to gather around me. I hear a common theme among those voices and that is one of completion without mercy. The very evil I sought to destroy for half of my existence is now in the position to be just that, destroyed. None the less, as I gather my strength, a new thought now daunts me. I think to myself, I do not want to be given this responsibility; it is not mine to take. I have put such an effort though and to be this close and not want to push one more. This evil entity was able to give herself a mere extra moments of words but for what? She clearly could not recover from this without me and at the time, I will not let her recover but the final blow? Then it dawns on me, she is merely attempting to push her existence as much as possible because as long as she’s here, she feels she can still torment. Amazingly enough, without trying, she may have already tormented me. Here I am in this endless loop of thoughts so have she gained the upper hand on me?

She taunts me with her words and just the sight of her is enough to anger the jolliest of souls. She is evil and not worth the extra second of breath she gives with each passing thought that runs through my mind. She mocks me now and I see her arm beginning to reach towards me as if in a last ditch effort to cause me harm. Come on man! Deliver the final blow! At least close this chapter in your life! Turning to my friends who have been there since day one, they each agree, it is time. While it is not in my character or in best interest to assume I and I alone can pass judgment over another, at least in this moment in time, I at least do my part to pass it on to another. I raise my hand and point my finger and after a few spoken words…

“Forgive me…”

This moment was granted to me because of special powers that were trusted to me for this very reason and as the burden of that trust reaches its peak, I take action delivering the final blow that at least for a small moment, brought me great joy as the torment finally ends...for now.